Tuesday, November 15, 2011

One more person calls me a Newly Wed, I'll flick their ear!

Its gonna be a ranting blog today!

I suppose having no children, both of us under 30 and I work at Bed Bath and Beyond, all add up to Newly Weds!

I'm not sure I know this new kind of math, because to me it doesn't add up, but then again I'm not good at math so I guess its true....ummm No.

And then my favorite reply to "No we've been married for 6 years" is " Oh how fun, you must love it."

Yeah well you know what, I do. I Love hanging out with my husband all the time. They house is usually free of crying, and the only hyper activity comes from Roxy when we let her in after being outside all day. Spontaneous trips to the mountains, or hiking to a hot spring at midnight and staying there until the sunrises is really fun. Playing Harry Potter Lego on the Wii together, then cooking dinner at 9 o'clock, sure who wouldn't love that life.

Everyone wants what they don't have, its human nature I suppose. I have dry skin that I hate and wish it were more oily, when someone else has really oily skin and wish it were dry. I could go on and on with this list; namely I have a really sporadic life full of adventure because we don't have kids. I LONG for children and yet we have none. Other side is that of a family of four and the parents wish for just a night alone together, just one night of adventure. We look at each others life and want it.

My mom would; and has told me to love what I have. Because, she says, kids will come all to soon and then I'll miss this. I'm sure she's right. And I do love my life, but I know some thing's missing.

Going to church doesn't help. You'd think it would, but when everyone is so focused on family and having more children, and when 1 out of every 5 women are pregnant, its hard to sit their, smile and listen; especially when none of the women know what you're going through. If I had a nickel for every time I heard the story "All my husband had to do was take off his pants and I was pregnant" Or variations of that anecdote, I would be able to buy myself a really nice sweater.

I'm going to give you all a little advice when it comes to infertility sympathy. DON'T say "It'll happen when its supposed to happen" or " When you least expect it, it'll happen" or "You're so lucky you don't have kids, don't you love the freedom" and anything to that effect. All you need to says is "That must be hard, I'm sorry" and leave it at that, anything else just drives the knife in deeper.

According to the church standards, Joey and I aren't full filling our duty, and in so doing, we are considered less then everyone else. I'm not invited to hang out with Mothers, play dates are for child bearing women only. Heaven forbid you have a non-child bearing women join you. I don't children, so I must not have Anything in common with you. I don't shop like you, or do my hair like you, or enjoy the same movies or television shows. We are just do different, sorry I can't be your friend.

You know what. Your loss. I'm a great person, I have a lot to offer. Sure I'm a little quite and I don't have the high energy I wish I did. But I'm a wonderful friend, loyal and kind and I will always be there for you. To bad you won't give me that chance. Go enjoy your children and mothers group, I hope you get spit up on!

This blog could be longer, but I have better things to do then whine and rage on an Internet site. I'm going to go make love to my husband and eat ice cream in bed. A good night to you all!

5 comments:

MeggyT said...

I miss you. I love you.

Anonymous said...

LOL, I love the "spit up on" threat, too silly. I know how you feel sweetie, and I know you know I know... :D

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE you!

Eric and Jill said...

I'm so sorry we don't live closer. I don't know if its because I have you and Amber for best friends or what but I know I always try to get those without kids to come to our playgroups. I've even held it at dog parks trying to get those with fun dogs like Roxy to come and play. I'm so sorry people don't understand.
As for the "newly wed thing"...it may also be that you guys are a lot more passionate than normal couples and still look so happy together just like newlyweds do. Not all of them for sure, those people are just ignorant, but some might see it that way. :)
So really, I guess what I want to say is that I'm sorry, that must be really hard because I know I don't know what you're going through. I still love you though and hope sex was great and the ice cream was delicious!

Brent Hill's Mortgage Minute said...

DO NOT FLICK EARS! This is your momma, what you should say is "Yes, it has been wonderful to be newlyweds for 6 years we have a beautiful life together!" When asked if you have children just say "someday" and leave it at that. Being angry doesn't hurt them it just gives you cancer so let it go...... love ya

Mandy Sue said...

I AM sorry, and that MUST be hard! I wish that we lived closer to each other, because I think that we would be couple friends! I miss hanging out with you and Amber! Oh well, reading your blog will have to do :) For the record, if we lived by each other, I would invite you to a playdate!